Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts

Plan D

A couple of months ago, I picked up an Apple Watch. I gotta say, I really like it. One of the first things I did was order a face shield for it because you know: scratches and dings.

When I got the cover, it had a bunch of air bubbles. I thought it was pretty shotty, but slapped it on the watch anyway because it's better than nothing. I've been using it for several months and never had a problem.

Last night I popped the cover off, because there was water under it. Grilltech asked about the face plate. I handed it over to him, with the comment of how crappy it was. He gave me a look, peeled off the plastic from the underside and handed it back.

The shield is clear now. And I feel like an idiot.

It's Made of Warm


On Sunday, we put the electric blanket on the bed. It has been chilly at night and I'm all about the warmth.

Anyway Uggy - the Ancient One - loves the electric blanket, almost as much as she loves good food. The animals get good food, on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday's. Usually what happens is all the animals start hanging out in the living room about 1700 (5 PM). Uggy will be pretty close to me - reminding me it's good food night, if not on me until 1900 (7 PM) when I feed them. Last night, I got home and turned the bed on. I didn't see Uggy all night until I got the food dishes out at 1730 (730 PM). She sauntered out and decided I could feed her.

Lucky me.

You're Not My *Real* Mom


I'm coming in from the back porch to the kitchen. Ruby is on the counter with her head in the bowl of grated cheese eating. I don't know why the kids taught her cheese is a kitty food, but that's not awesome.

Drive By



I did make banana bread last night. I really like how this recipe turned out, so I think it will be my go to recipe from now on. I really liked it so much, I ate half a loaf. (sigh)

I did manage to work on Grilltech's socks last night. I'm about six, six and a half inches long at this point, so I'm pretty close to starting the heel. Two at a time really makes me feel like these socks are taking forever. I know it's not really, but it just feels that way.

Bingo


I'm not sure I won at knitting bingo or not, but I might have been close. In the span of one and a half hours I heard the following:
  • Three wish I could knit, but it's to fiddly for me.
  • Two You knit? I crochet!
  • One I've never seen two (socks) at a time before. My friend uses four needles to knit her socks.
  • And a those are ugly, to which I said nothing and just kept knitting.
  • I was also tagged with a photo last night and got the if I buy the yarn, will you make it for me?
I've heard of all these things being said to people, but I didn't expect it to happen to me in such a small window of time.

World Ending


I have a friend who is convinced the world is going to change sometime in late September. I'm pretty sure everything is going to stay the same. Color me unimpressed. World has gone on for at least four billion years and I'm sure it will stay even longer. Why am I talking about this?

Because he was right, the world ended today. Facebook is down.

How will the world continue? Is there any point of going on?

Worst Cat Guardian Ever...

Left Fran out side for two hours while I was off knitting.

How will I live with the shame?

Liar!

I think the Wii is lying to me. It's been 98 days since I've last been on it and according to it, I've lost 8.4 pounds. The last time it's told me I lost that much, two days later, I gained 10.

I think it's lying.

1000 Words

Down the street on a fall day


My sweater is close to being done. Still haven't decided on a neckline.


Finished my row. Forever to go.


I made cookies today...


...and made a mess in the oven.

True Neutral?

I Am A: True Neutral Human Sorcerer (6th Level)


Ability Scores:

Strength-11

Dexterity-11

Constitution-12

Intelligence-14

Wisdom-14

Charisma-12


Alignment:
True Neutral A true neutral character does what seems to be a good idea. He doesn't feel strongly one way or the other when it comes to good vs. evil or law vs. chaos. Most true neutral characters exhibit a lack of conviction or bias rather than a commitment to neutrality. Such a character thinks of good as better than evil after all, he would rather have good neighbors and rulers than evil ones. Still, he's not personally committed to upholding good in any abstract or universal way. Some true neutral characters, on the other hand, commit themselves philosophically to neutrality. They see good, evil, law, and chaos as prejudices and dangerous extremes. They advocate the middle way of neutrality as the best, most balanced road in the long run. True neutral is the best alignment you can be because it means you act naturally, without prejudice or compulsion. However, true neutral can be a dangerous alignment when it represents apathy, indifference, and a lack of conviction.


Race:
Humans are the most adaptable of the common races. Short generations and a penchant for migration and conquest have made them physically diverse as well. Humans are often unorthodox in their dress, sporting unusual hairstyles, fanciful clothes, tattoos, and the like.


Class:
Sorcerers are arcane spellcasters who manipulate magic energy with imagination and talent rather than studious discipline. They have no books, no mentors, no theories just raw power that they direct at will. Sorcerers know fewer spells than wizards do and acquire them more slowly, but they can cast individual spells more often and have no need to prepare their incantations ahead of time. Also unlike wizards, sorcerers cannot specialize in a school of magic. Since sorcerers gain their powers without undergoing the years of rigorous study that wizards go through, they have more time to learn fighting skills and are proficient with simple weapons. Charisma is very important for sorcerers; the higher their value in this ability, the higher the spell level they can cast.


Find out What Kind of Dungeons and Dragons Character Would You Be?, courtesy of Easydamus (e-mail)

But I don't wanna....

But Aunt Roxie, I'd have to get dressed and put on tennis shoes to walk the movie up to the killer of mom-and-pop video stores RedBox for the kids. The dog isn't here to drag me down there. So can I just stay home tonight and drive down tomorrow?

I didn't think so...

Did I Mention?

Much like my Sister to the East, I am made of salt and will melt when gotten wet. Aunt Roxie, not only sent me out to return a movie, tried to kill me!

Think I'm making it up?
It rained on my way back from the killer of mom-and-pop video stores RedBox. If I didn't have such a high dodge skill, I could have melted. It was awful.

Think she bought it?

Seriously? I wasn't laying it on a bit thick? Good.

Now for what really happened:

It was a lovely walk. Another couple was walking the other direction. The foot hills were lit up by the sun, but I was covered with dark clouds on the way East. Very lovely effect. There was very little in the way of passing traffic. I think most of the people were still home getting ready for what ever date they had planned.

Believe it or not, but the foot hills are green. Sure there are splotches of brown on the southern sides of the ridges, but the northern side is a lush green. I'd forgotten how beautiful the city can be during spring and summer. A large flowering tree was dropping it's flowers when I walked under it. The ground was littered with them and more were coming.

The walk back was even better. The rain began to fall, soft and warm. The kind of rain that's cleansing. Cars rushed by, windshield wipers smearing the dust to mud.

By the time I reached the front door, it had stopped. A nice ending to an evening walk. Now if you'll excuse me, I think the next storm is starting to roll through.